


Venus

by chromyrose



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cunnilingus, Exploration, F/M, First Time, Homestuck Kink Meme, M/M, Multi, Mutual Masturbation, POV Second Person, Threesome - F/M/M, Xenophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-21
Updated: 2012-12-21
Packaged: 2017-11-21 23:27:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/603228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chromyrose/pseuds/chromyrose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the Kink Meme request: "Dave teaches Karkat how to please a human female." Exactly what it says on the tin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Venus

**Author's Note:**

> During finals week, I went on a tour at the Metropolitan Museum led by my life drawing professor, and I saw all the gorgeous Venus paintings they had in the European wing. Those paintings of the goddess posed (vaguely erotically) with all this pink tint to her supple flesh really gave me a solid sense of direction for this fic. I really wanted to capture that sense of removal, the idea of a person looking at something entirely unlike them, marveling at this mysterious majesty. And, I went with the nook and tentabulge headcanon for troll genitalia, not that it matters too much. Ultimately, I hope you enjoy it!

Jade lays between you on the concupiscent couch, naked but for the cotton fabric of her bra and panties, and Dave’s lips affixed to hers. 

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you’re not really sure how these two humans managed to rope you into a double matespritship with them, but for now there are much greater things on your mind. Your three year long meteor joyride through paradox space finally reached the rendezvous point with Egbert and Harley’s ship just… well, you’re not a time player and have no real way to measure its passage, but it wasn’t that long ago. And Strider, the asshole, decided that if this relationship was going to happen, he was going to have to show you how to properly ‘take care’ of a human female.

Jade had laughed at that, wondering when Dave had ever had any experience with a human female before, with a sassy little smirk that did funny things to your bloodpusher. Dave pled that he had learned enough from porn to know more than Karkat did, at any rate, and now they were all in her room, on her concupiscent couch ( _except they called it a_ bed), and she is undoubtedly being ravaged by Strider. 

A breathy, high-pitched moan draws you from your thoughts, and you’re uncomfortably flushed as you catch sight of Harley’s tongue flicking about inside Strider’s mouth. They make a good couple, you think; human, and gorgeous together with the juxtaposed white/tan skin tones and the way their bodies just fit like they’re supposed to. You think of the first time you and Strider kissed, and how your sharp teeth nearly tore his lip off. It’s not something you enjoy remembering. 

“Karkaaaaat,” Jade trembles, pushing Dave away gently to reach an arm out for you. “You’re getting left out!”

You snort. “It’s not my fault Strider doesn’t understand your human principle of ‘sharing’.”

“Hey man, the lady wanted a kiss and it’s not like you were offering.”

Which, okay, true, you weren’t exactly offering. But again, you aren’t exactly a master at kissing fleshy, soft human mouths. 

Jade doesn’t give you much of a choice, though; she shimmies across the sheets, really knees her way to your lap, and when her tush is situated against your bony thigh she throws her hands around your neck.

“I bet you’ll be better at this than Dave is,” she teases, and then she has her lips on yours. Her mouth is softer than Dave’s, or maybe just smoother; you’re not sure if this is a female thing, or if Strider’s skin is just worse than hers. She’s gentle and get earnest, taking what she wants but definitely not pushing you to give any more than that. Which is good. Not being pushed is good. Of course, part of you would like to push, push her right down onto the couch and kiss her until she’s bruised and satisfied. But you don’t know if humans work that way, especially ones that are this soft and fleshy. 

You start to kiss her back and yeah, yes, this feels really good. She’s as warm as you are, maybe warmer, and her hair is falling over your shoulder and the smell of her, grass and sweet things that you can’t really name, Earth things, they must be, overwhelm your senses, but it’s her hands on your shoulders and her lips probing against yours that are keeping you anchored in the moment. You tilt your head, slide your rough troll lips over her mouth and she makes one of those breathy sounds. You’re comforted, because at least now you know you’re not messing this up. 

Suddenly there’s a third hand on your back, and Strider is easing you down over her. You are, in fact, pinning her down on the couch- bed, the way you’d imagined, and alarms are going off in your head because you can’t just _have_ what you want, the universe has never been so kind, you’ll probably fuck this up somehow. 

Strider’s hand then busies itself rubbing the very sensitive skin at the base of one of your horns and you trill, and Jade moans. 

The kiss breaks and you pull away enough to see what you’ve reduced her too; Jade’s skin is bright pink, her lips are flushed red and swollen, and her sharp green eyes are moist. She pants softly, a very quiet whistling sound coming from her overbite as she does so, and she just might be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

Then Strider’s hand is off your body, and he’s back on your other side, looking down at her with the same pity you realize must be on your face, too. He leans down to kiss her jaw and nibbles at the skin in a way you could never, ever do, and it takes you a moment to see that he’s now shirtless.

“Rule number one about girls,” he starts, his hands roaming absently over Jade’s belly, or so you think, “they need lots of kissing. Lots.”

“Mhmm,” Jade agrees. “All of the kissing, even.”

You want to snap at her not to being up such an old, dead joke, but she’s lying all curled up, hands tossed over her torso and thighs pressed together to the knee, bent in, and the sight of her just does _things_ to you. 

You wonder, briefly, if this is something you’re simply not meant to know, if there is something here that humans have long since named, identified, understood, about the overwhelming _femaleness_ of this moment. Troll gender has never meant much, not as much as Dave and Rose assure you it does for humankind, and you wonder if maybe there is some socialization you have never gone through that makes the look of Jade like this so arresting. 

“You’re staring,” she murmurs, dropping her arms and pulling herself up to sitting. “Everything okay in there?”

“Y-yeah,” manages to come out of your throat, which now feels constricted. Being with Dave was one thing, and this is a whole other. 

Jade gives you a gentle smile, and a tender pap to the cheek that bothers you, it really does, it’s the wrong quadrant entirely, but nonetheless it makes you calm down.

“Good job, Vantas, girls really go for the mushy romantic shit,” Strider cuts in, but he doesn’t sound sarcastic, just mocking. “You gettin’ worked up, Jade?”

“Definitely,” she agrees, and you hear a hitch in Dave’s breath that comforts you because, wow, okay, you’re not the only one who is a little freaked out. 

“Silly boys,” Jade laughs, grabbing one of each of your hands. “Relax. I’m not going to get mad if it’s not perfect.”

“Like hell it won’t be perfect,” Dave protests. He still has a hand on her belly, the one she’s not holding, and he squeezes her flesh gently with it. You watch as he dives in for another kiss, and when she lets go of his hand, they both move to her back. 

Suddenly the shoulder straps of her bra are loosened. The kiss breaks, and Dave pulls the garment away with him. You’re breathless, and even Jade seems a little flustered. 

“So smooth, cool kid! But, how’d you know how to take it off?”  
He puts the lacey thing aside and smirks. “A cool kid ain’t a cool kid unless he knows how to un-bra a lady.”

“I’m swooooning!” Jade teases, but you still sense some discomfort from her. Her rumble spheres are hanging unveiled, now, and you can only assume that’s a big deal. 

Strider nudges you. “Rule number two, you gotta give some love to the girls when you’re making love to a girl.”

You’re somewhat annoyed in his riddle talk, but then he starts to demonstrate, leaning in to her chest and cupping the fleshy mound in his entire palm. His thumb brushes over the dusty, brownish-pink ring in the center, and you note with fascination that it seems to be growing more pointed. 

Dave takes off his shades and puts them aside, and you see his bright crimson eyes catch Jade’s green ones for a split second before he closes his mouth over the pointy little bud. Jade gasps and moans, her eyes falling shut. 

Hesitantly, you reach for her second rumble sphere; you squeeze it shyly and feel how soft, supple, _squishy_ it is. There is simply no way you’ll put your mouth near anything so yielding; you don’t trust yourself not to tear into it. Even your claws, short and blunt though they are, make you nervous. 

Jade puts her hand over yours, and when you look up in surprise, she’s smiling at you. “Go on, it’s okay.”

You try to emulate what you saw Strider do, and rub the pad of your thumb over the even fleshier different colored skin. You’re surprised by the hardness of that pointed little nub, something that trolls lack entirely. Jade breaths softly, and when you look down again Strider is still sucking on her rumble sphere, biting the nub-tip carefully; the area around it is beginning to redden but Jade doesn’t seem to mind. 

Assuming then that she likes some pressure on the area, you pinch the nub between your thumb and forefinger and roll it slowly, and Jade is definitely smiling at you when you do, a little sweaty now. Her fingers dig into Strider’s hair and she pulls him up by it, kisses him intensely and her whole body shivers. Strider pulls away from the kiss and his hands start to sink, sink down until they’re at the seam of her panties, in the groove between her pelvis and thigh. He rubs at the skin there and Jade bites on her lip. 

“You look a little wet,” he says, the little stutter in his voice betraying him. You look down, and see a dark spot on the outside of her underwear, now that her thighs have been separated. There is no sign of a bulge anywhere, and it fascinates you, but you’re also flushing to the tips of your ears. 

It’s becoming too hot, and so you shuck your turtleneck off, in time to hear Jade hum.

“Y-yeah. You can take them off.”

Strider doesn’t hesitate, rolling the fabric off her legs, and you notice how the wet part sticks to her a little. You can see short hairs at her crotch, dark like the rest of her hair but a little curlier, and your curiosity gets the better of you. Your fingers wind in the small patch of hair, and it’s coarse, unlike the soft wisps of hair down there that Strider has. 

Jade is breathing hard now, so you look up; she’s leaned back against the headboard and her head is braced on a pillow, so she can look down at you. Her glasses are a little foggy, and her lips are open as she pants. You follow the swooping curves of her body, from her cheeks to her shoulders, to her rumble spheres and her small, pudgy, adorable belly, to wide hips and round, mountainous thighs. There isn’t a thing about her that doesn’t scream beauty, you think, from her curtain of hair that curls around her ribcage, to the pinkness crawling over the tan of her skin, the gentle dips and puckers of her flesh where she’s been scarred and healed and grown and aged. Even the dog ears on her head, new and somewhat out of place, are bent down in submissive heat, and make her look so fucking pitiful it makes you want to rip your bloodpusher out and feed it to a lusus. 

Then, shyly, and with a gentle nudge from Dave’s hand, Jade spreads her legs apart, and you’re looking at the brightest pinkest flesh her body has to offer. It starts with a small nub, a hood of flesh, then opens; two large folds of skin part to show a nook, and maybe it doesn’t look exactly like a troll’s but you understand this. It’s flushed, probably swollen from it’s usually size, and there is a little liquid beading at the opening. 

“R-rule number three,” Strider stutters, and you remember again that this is as new for him as it is for you. As much pornography as he’s seen (and you don’t doubt it’s been a lot), he’s never seen the real thing. “Don’t just, uh, shove your junk up there…”

He trails off, and you look up to see color flooding his cheeks, highlighting all the little freckles he has. Without his shades he looks younger, more impressionable, softer, and even pitiable, too. 

You come to the conclusion that these two are going to ruin you, but right now you just don’t care. Strider’s bulge is tight in his pants, you can see it clearly, and it makes you aware of your own coming out to play. Reluctantly you undo the fly of your pants, and at least it’s a little relief. 

Dave does the same to his own pants, but then turns back to Jade and presses his finger very cautiously over the pink nub of skin at the top of her nook. He rubs it along in a slow circle and Jade’s breath comes out slow from between her teeth. 

“B-bundle of nerves,” she explains to you, a little shakily but she’s smiling. “It feels really good.”

Dave chuckles a bit, his shoulders relaxing, and he rubs a little more quickly. Jade mewls softly, her hands holding her thighs down and apart. 

“You look really… beautiful,” you say, and feel stupid for saying it but Dave doesn’t laugh at you, surprisingly. Jade looks like she’s glowing, that or just on fire, and she pants out a smile and a short “thank you” before Dave does something that makes her howl. 

He takes that as some sort of unspoken cue to lean in and press a kiss to her bright pink genitals. The sight of such depravity makes you blush, and recall the feeling of his mouth on your bulge for the two seconds it managed to stay there. Jade seems to react much the way you remember reacting; she inhales sharply, and her whole body tenses. This time, Dave have to help her keep her thighs spread lest his head get crushed between them. 

His lips close around one of the flaps of skin and he sucks hard on it, then his tongue laps up the moisture coming out of her nook, probes gently the surrounding area. Jade’s fingers work their way into his hair and claw at his scalp, and you wince before you remember she doesn’t actually have claws with which to slice Dave’s thin human skin. 

Jade’s other hand grabs one of your and brings it in closer to her nook, and she presses your finger to the little nub Dave was rubbing before. She gasps and it encourages you to rub the searing hot skin with the rough pad of your finger, ever cautious that your calluses might scratch the smoothness of her flesh.

You’re so focused that you almost miss it when Jade starts to whimper, but you don’t miss it when her nook clenches right beneath your fingers, under Strider’s tongue, or when she starts to whine your names. Her hips buck up and down and move jerkily, as though she’s fighting off possession by some demon, and then she collapses, dropping onto her back flat on the concupiscent couch. 

“You alright, babe?” Strider asks, idly running his palm over her smooth, downy thigh. Jade hums and smiles a little sleepily.

“So much better than just alright,” she confirms. “That felt sooooo good!”

She giggles and pulls herself up, then kisses you each on the cheek in turn. There is still something nagging at you.

“Where is… is there no genetic material?”

This time they both laugh. 

“It would probably be counterproductive for girls to shoot anything out when they orgasm,” Jade explains, “since we’re supposed to retain boys’ genetic material and internally gestate our offspring!”

“Right…”

You knew humans gave live birth, like other species of Alternian mammal, but the idea of being used as both a bucket and a mother grub still repulsed you; social constructs like those were hard to shake. 

Strider laughs again, and you kind of want to punch him even though you figure you must be making a face. Then he leans in and kisses you, and palms at your bulge still trapped in your clothes, and you want to punch him significantly less. Jade is the one who’s giggling now, as you and Strider make a race of liberating one another’s bulges and stroking them off, your lips still locked in combat. 

“Boys,” she sighs dramatically. You sneak a glance at her and she's touching herself and oh, shit, that’s really hot and Strider’s hand finds the really sensitive spot of your nook and—

You decaptachalouge your bucket with practiced speed and it’s between your legs just in time to catch your genetic material. You’re not sure which of the humans starts applauding first, but soon enough the both of them are hooting and hollering at you. You’re too tired to do anything more than flip them off and slump into a reclined position on the bed. 

Dave gets himself off, and shoots his genetic material into the bucket. It’s not nearly as much as yours but he winks at you after he’s cum, and you kick his shin. Jade shifts and puts your bucket off to the side, then kisses you and Dave before worming in between you and grinning.

“Next time I want you to do that in me,” she whispered to you, giggling. You feel scandalized and probably look it, too, but then Jade kisses you again and she’s wrapping herself around your body.

“So, what do you think of girls?” 

You can’t think of anything to say right away, because wow, wow, how can you put all that you've thought and felt about her into words? You settle for, “I… can’t really complain.”

And, you’re pretty sure Jade and Dave understand. 

 

_end_


End file.
